Things We Wish We Could Say To Customers / Colleagues:

I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit.

I have plenty of talent and vision. I just don't give a f***.

I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to pronounce.

How about "never"? Is "never" good for you?

I'll have my people screw your people.

It sounds like English, but I can't understand a word you're saying.

I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.

Ahhh...I see the screw-up fairy has visited us again...

You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.

I'm already visualizing the duct tape over your mouth.

Are you coming on to me or having a seizure?

The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.

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